When the cure feels worse than the illness
I’ve always had pretty bad, acne-prone skin. Most of my the years of my teens and twenties were spent hoping that I wouldn’t have a severe break-out right before Christmas or my birthday, so that I wouldn’t look bad in perpetuity in photographs. I’ve gotten various treatments from doctors and dermatologists in the past that have helped to an extent, but while I was finishing my thesis, everything sort of slid and going to the dermatologist just got pushed aside like so many other things.
Lately, I’ve had a severe flare-up on my face. I try not to be overly worried about what other people may think of my appearance. But it is hard when you are meeting new people for the first time, to know that this is the first impresssion that they will have of you. I’ve been glad for the days in the lab where I can hide (more or less) on the scope (confocal microscope) and take pictures in the dark. Then analyze my images with my back facing the lab, due to the set-up of the computer. When I realized that I was looking forward to hiding from people, I was finally prompted to find and go to a new dermatologist here in MN.
Fortunately, when I was calling and trying to schedule an appointment, the receptionist who was helping me was willing to look through the schedules of multiple doctors to see if any of them could get me in before March. And one doctor had a cancellation for two weeks from when I callled.
Well, I have just spent my first week on the treatment program and it has been rather strange. I’ve turned bright red (one of the side effects), had a lot of pealing (evidently, one of the intended effects – but disconcerting to say the least), an increase in headaches (side effect) and a lot of stomach upset (side effect).
The good news is though that I think it is working. Slowly but surely. And I think that some of the side effects may get better as I adjust to the drugs – or at least that is what Wikipedia is telling me about some of them. I also have to figure out how often to apply one of the drugs (every other day or every third day) to avoid the redness and severe dryness.
I don’t know that you really wanted to hear about this…. but well, it has been so strange this week, I felt like it was worth talking about. Or at least that I needed to talk about it.
Squirl says:
You poor thing. That sounds just miserable! I’m sorry you have the acne problem, but that cure sounds like minor hell. I hope the side effects calm down soon for you.
Does this have anything to do with Retin A. That’s what the redness and peeling sound like to me. But I don’t really know that much about any of these drugs.
Good luck, hope you’re feeling better soon.
Danielle says:
Yes, you guessed it, the one that is causing the redness is a retinoid. The one that is causing the peeling (and is known for it) is the benzoyl peroxide wash.
Thanks for the sympathy.
I feel almost silly for whining about my acne…. but earlier today my stomach was bothering me so much and my appetite is so completely off that I was feeling pretty frustrated.
SeaQueen says:
Poor kid. I’m sorry to hear that the side effects are really hitting you. I hope it gets better soon (you’re probably right, they’ll probably lessen as your body adjusts to them). I also hope you get your appetite back soon, tummy aches are the one side effect that really bothers me.
LadyBug says:
Honey, this is YOUR space. You talk about whatever you want/need to talk about.
I hope the side effects get better and/or go away completely. Especially the headache part, as I know that was already an issue for you.
And I hope the treatment works so well that you find yourself actually looking forward to having your picture taken at Christmas.
Love and hugs to you, my friend.
Ern says:
You shouldn’t feel like it is petty or silly or whiny to talk about acne. I think that a lot of people don’t understand how devastating it can be to your psyche to have acne prone skin. Maybe they think that dermatologists have a superficial job, but feeling good about your skin when you greet people can make such a difference in your mental health. I hope the side-effects get better for you.
I had terrible acne from 5th grade all the way into college, at which point I finally went on accutane (talk about the cure being worse than the illness!). I think that it had a very negative impact on my self-esteem.
And I second what Ladybug said about Christmas pictures.
Texas Seestor says:
Hang in there. It does sound like the various treatments are making a positive difference although it may take a while to get all of the side effects addressed/minimized. I am just glad you found a dermatologist who could get you in sooner rather than later. I had a rash a few months ago on my forehead and couldn’t get in to see anyone for 2 months…ugh, it was itchey, weepey (spelling?), and gross and I couldn’t wait that long. And, I am glad they are willing to work with you which it sounds like they are. Yeah!
And, I agree with LadyBug…you can talk about whatever you want…it’s your blog.
Danielle says:
All of your support means more to me right now than you will ever know.
And Ern, I can’t believe t hat with your current great skin condition that you ever had bad acne! It gives me hope. Accutane is slated as the last resort treatment in my regimen. I’m hoping I don’t have to go that route.